March 01, 2007

Early returns

The circus is officially in town (some would say the zoo, but I love animals and I think it's a disservice to animals to compare politicians to them; at least animals can be loyal). Some thoughts on early political ads and taglines:

Itanim natin sa Senado
- Pichay. The best reason not to be vegetarian. Bad pun, even worse pic.

My guy, Magsaysay. - Vic Magsaysay. Couldn't he be more original?

Pag bad ka, lagot ka. - Joker Arroyo. The worst part of this campaign tagline is that Joker doesn't have a sense of humor. Well, I'm bad and so too is his primary benefactor--the Arroyo woman and the Arroyo men. With apologies to all my Assumptionista friends and readers, will Joker make them and not only me lagot? I don't think so. (And what's with the absolutely lame analogy of being the dragon of the Senate? Where'd that come from? Sir, there are no dragons; at least not anymore. Is that the subliminal picture you're pushing? That you'll go the way of dragons?)

Ko-Recto sa Senado. - Ralph Recto. In the post-EDSA era, when Ralph's father used to lawyer for the Marcoses and was so successful at getting the goat of the powers that used to be (Joker was one of them, I remember), his detractors came up with a stinging tagline when Raffy Recto ran for the Senate--ang Recto na hindi Claro (a play on the name and reputation of the late Clayo Mayo Recto). I wouldn't go as far as saying Ralph is the Recto who's not Claro--in fact, he's very clear on where he stands on a lot of issues, particularly the VAT and that might spell doom for much of his chances of making it to the Senate. Of course, his being Mr. Vilma Santos will help.

The jury's still out on the other candidates.


Phil said...

Care to share your shortlist of candidates, Ted? I need ideas.

seiji said...

what about mike defensor's "tol"? ehehehe :)

incarnadine29 said...

correction CJ -- "fighting 'tol." Hahaha.

TED said...

@phil: right now, it's a very short list with only ONE possible--Joker; I'm still hoping he wakes up or realizes what he has done--allying himself with Gloria and that he cannot make them "lagot" even if they're really, really bad.

@seiji and incarnadine29: are you who I think you are? he he he. Mike Defensor's "tol" deserves a separate post (coming) if only because it's a witty play on a word--brother in the vernacular and the ironic "tall" considering he's not. Again, it may be just me, reading things into what they may not have thought of. He won't be voted for but he'll win--Gloria will make sure of that for her favorite son.

seiji said...

i might be who you think i am, sir. hehe :) anyway, if my vote counts, i won't vote for "fighting 'tol". and this is my #1 reason, among others: his daughter is my daughter's classmate. his kid keeps on giving my kid bubble gum! (my kid isn't allowed to have any). and he even asked his kid to "distribute" pocket calendars and chocolates to her classmates. grabe.

incarnadine29 said...

Hi Sir! Hehe.

Am looking forward to that "fighting 'tol" post. :)

incarnadine29 said...

How about candidates who don't have their own identities?

Mrs. Roco who promotes herself primarily through the accomplishments of her deceased husband. (another Cory?)

John Osmena who is banking on the Osmenas' long and supposedly noble legacy in politics. His dentures look scary, by the way.

And of course, Noynoy Aquino, whose ad was all about his late father's accomplishments rather than his own.

TED said...

@malou (aka incarnadine29):

I totally agree about Mrs. Roco; I sat through the LSG sponsored forum where 2 GO candidates appeared together with two mouthpieces. I was struck by just how many references Sonia Roco made to Raul Roco; it is as if the ghost of Raul Roco were running, instead of her.

Let me say this about the other candidates' personas:

Chiz's ads are cheesy (pun intended); he's not the greatest looking person in the world and so, the ads shouldn't focus on him but on his unique way of speaking and his good grasp of issues. As it is, all that is spread out is . . . Chiz and that's cheesy.

Kiko's ads are incomprehensible. I have no idea what he is being marketed as. He should market himself as the only candidate who dared to run on the belief that he cannot be allied with two presidents whom he has claimed are unfit to run the country, Erap and Gloria. That is his only selling point as an independent but, as with Kiko most of the time, he misses the point.

I don't want to waste time on Manny Villar and his ST ads (at least now its no longer Rosanna Roces, remember that?) even with Jennylyn Mercado there (pretty face, bad ad).

I can't wait to see Oliver Lozano's ad or even Pepito Cayetano (all the while, I thought he was the representative of the balding sector, pepito kasi. . . ang buhok; turns out he had a full shock of hair).